Thursday, July 09, 2009

Over the Top

Place: Incredible Pizza
Lunch: Buffet, Dr Pepper

Years ago (1992 or so), Radio Shack decided to get in the big box retail business and started a chain called "Incredible Universe". The massive outlets had a centralized entry area with a center court surrounding by what may as well have been mall slots specializing in different things. There was a camera store. A software store. A computer store. A music store. A phone store. A gadget store (in essence, a Radio Shack within a...never mind). In the middle was an entry into a massive television/audio/appliance area...itself the size of today's Best Buy's...with unheard of features at the time like listening rooms and home theater rooms. Then you wound around to a checkstand area where other miscellaneous items were sold.

It was very cool, but they only built a couple dozen of them before shutting it all down.

Still, it was unique and very impressive. Over the top. Even if my cousin and I referred to it as "the Incredible Overglorified Radio Shack".

Incredible Pizza has nothing to do with Incredible Universe, but I sure drew a lot of similarities to them on my first visit today.

It all started a month or two ago when I noticed they were painting the old long-since abandoned Albertson's. Then they started putting up signage. Buffet. Salads. Go-Karts.

An 85,000 square-foot buffet?!?

Turns out Incredible Pizza, a chain out of Missouri, is something of a buffet/indoor theme park. Think Casa Bonita without the waterfall. Cartman would LOVE this place. I don't think they're using all 85,000 square feet the building has to offer, but they're using at least half of it.

You walk in and pay for the buffet and buy a game card (the game card is optional). The game card is a "credit" card you put however much money you want on for games. Instead of tokens or quarters, the games all have card readers. How cool is that.

The "pizza" buffet, a 50's theme in white red and black, is far more extensive than just pizza. You can make a REALLY impressive salad here. They have soups. They have pastas, including lasagna. They have chicken strips. They have country-fried steak strips. They have some sort of mystery meat strip that falls somewhere between a Swedish meatball and meat loaf. They have potatoes, casseroles, all sorts of crap. They have fresh fruit. They have an almost Golden Corral-extensive dessert counter. They have taco fixings with TWO KINDS OF TACO MEAT! Soupy and non-soupy. I love you already.

And they have pizza, of course.

Nobody will credit Incredible Pizza for top-notch quality food. It's average at best, but none of it is bad by any means. It's well worth the price. $5.99, drink included, during lunch. $9.99 for dinner except Friday and Saturday, when you'll pay $10.99. The west side Cici's will hurt because of this place to be sure. Happy Joe's may as well close. Again.

After you fill your plate, you need to choose a dining room. By mean "choose", I mean there's FOUR of them, all themed. There's the "Gymnasium", the "Route 66 diner", a family room theme of some sort (it's the only one I didn't enter), and the "Starlite Drive-In", which is a dark blacklit room with a cheesy yet workable drive-in movie theme. No, you can't drive your car in. Yes, they show movies. "The Parent Trap" is running this afternoon. Oh yes...they also have several private party rooms.

Once you've eaten (and yes, you could make four trips and eat in each dining room if you wanted...in fact, you can't really save your existing seat if you're alone anyway), it's off to the fairgrounds. This is an arcade room with video games, pinball, games of chance, miniature golf, bumper cars, and a go-kart track (they appear to be electric...they make no noise at all...and don't go very fast). The place is overrun with kids, of course, but anybody is welcome. And everything here could appeal to any age. Imagine your company department being on each other's nerves and settling the score with a trip to the bumper cars. The game rates are all reasonable too. The go-karts are the priciest option at $4.50 for a race. And yes, while you can't take food into the fairgrounds itself, nothing is stopping you from eating a plate, playing some games, and coming back out and eating some more. Totally legal. I'm **not** sure you could come in just for games, though. And kids can't show up under a certain age without adults. I can't remember the age. Actually, why would I care?

The only complaint I have is that they need more pinball machines. There's only one. Video games too, actually. Too much of the fairgounds is devoted to games of chance where you try to win tickets. There's easily space available for more.

But yeah...Pretty cool place.

Very over the top.