Lunch: Fish sandwich, cheese fries, Pepsi
Smiling Counter Girl: "How are you today?"
Me: "Fine! How are you?"
"Smiling Counter Girl: "I wish Spring would get here already."
Me: "Yeah."
Smiling Counter Girl: "At least it's rain this weekend, not snow."
Me: "Yeah. Maybe we'll get a little melting done."
Smiling Counter Girl: "Yeah."
Me: "..."
Smiling Counter Girl: "..."
Smiling Counter Girl: "So, did you want to order some food?"
Saw my first and probably last show of KISS's "End of the Road" tour last night. I'm really lacking the stamina for these arena shows anymore. I have good days and I have bad days since my health issues a couple years back. I can't stand up for long stretches of time in any case, and you jerks won't sit down and watch the show even though you paid for perfectly good SEATS. I don't want to stare at your butts. I am not a butt person. Don't even get me started on thongs. So I really need to retire from going to arena shows.
The girl next to me was having a blast. I was up and air guitaring and singing along to "Deuce" and she was right there with me screaming every lyric and even getting a little physical. It was her fourth ever KISS show, my sixteenth, which impressed the hell out of her. I hated being such a bore the rest of the time.
My personal KISStory dates back to the summer of 1978. We didn't have much access to rock music on that remote island in middle of nowhere. There was no such thing as rock on television aside from maybe Burt Sugarman's Midnight Special then. There were two local radio stations. One was a public station that played snotty classical and new age nonsense. The commercial station on the AM dial played a current adult contemporary hit, then a catalog adult contemporary or country crossover hit, then an ancient beautiful music selection. They rotated those three categories all day. It was as surreal as it was ridiculous. (Yes, that's where I started my radio career.) At night, you could pick up AM hit stations out of Vancouver and Victoria, and KEX out of my beloved hometown of Portland (also KISS guitarist Tommy Thayer’s hometown...in fact he graduated from the same high school my mother did). But even there it was the hits, and no hard rock. And my brain was craving something harder. Something I didn't even really know for sure existed, but I wanted to find anyway.
I found it by browsing the racks at the local record store (and we had a surprisingly good one). I bought records and tapes based on nothing but album cover art. And that's how I came to buy my first KISS album, "Love Gun". That album cover was the literal visual description of what I'd hoped to find.
Wade, the older kid who lived next door, was not impressed. "You bought WHAT? Gross! They spit ketchup on stage!"
Yeah, whatever.
I put the tape in my portable cassette player. I hit play. And the first thing I heard was the scorching opening guitar riffs to "I Stole Your Love". And that's all it took. It was exactly what I was looking for. It was exactly what I needed.
The second KISS album I got was "Hotter Than Hell", purchased at a Musicland in Butte, Montana during that last great road trip my family took. It is to this day my favorite KISS album.
KISS, of course, was known more for their outlandish shows and visuals than music. So that led me to magazines that featured pictures of the band and their shows, which in turn gave me another outlet to discover other bands. But none of them carried the infatuation I had with KISS. My bedroom walls were covered in KISS posters. And by the end of that first summer, that neighbor kid Wade's bedroom was too.
I couldn't actually have the ultimate KISS experience and go to any shows, of course. We didn't have any such thing on any level up there. And the band was in turmoil by the time I found them. There were the solo albums. Then the two poppy discoey albums. Then the mother of all disasters known as "The Elder", which was so poorly received they didn't even bother trying to support with a tour. It was like finding the ultimate party where you’d finally found your people and the place where you fit in just as everyone was going home.
I still didn't abandon the band as so many did, though it was a complete surprise to see "Creatures of the Night" on the new release shelf. And that was a great album. To this day, I probably listen to it more than any other KISS record. KISS got a new groove and really created a new legacy in the unmasked era of the eighties.
It was May 26, 1990 when I finally got to see a KISS show. The "Hot in the Shade" tour, Red River Fairgrounds, Fargo, North Dakota. An outdoor show the radio station I worked for at the time was involved in promoting, so we were all there for free. Knowing the limitations of the stage there, I didn't feel like I'd get to see the whole experience (and what an experience it was, the stage set had a massive sphinx...cleverly nicknamed Leon...as its backdrop), so I also got tickets for the next show in Duluth the following night.
What did they open those shows with? What was the first thing I got to hear KISS play live?
"I Stole Your Love".
The story had come full circle.
What is it that makes a KISS show so unforgettable? Sure you've got the trademark fireworks and theatrics, but you also have a lot of great party songs. Who's released more timeless anthems than KISS? "Shout It Out Loud." "Detroit Rock City." "God of Thunder." "I Love It Loud." "Heaven's on Fire." "Lick It Up." And, of course, "Rock and Roll All Night." That music is built to thrill a live audience. How can you not sing along? No band can give an audience a rock and roll high like KISS can, and nobody works harder to do so. Yeah, the vocals are a little frazzled now, but they still bring it. And the new stage show and the amount of pyro used is just ridiculous.
It would have been impossible for that kid back in 1978 to comprehend being able to see KISS live 40 years later.
But I'm thrilled that I did.
All sixteen of my KISS shows:
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