Place: Taco Bell
Lunch: Enchrito, Doritos Locos Taco Supreme (no tomato), Nachos Supreme (no tomato), Pepsi
Me: "I'll have an Enchrito..."
Fast Talking Counter Girl: "Beefchickenorsteak?"
Me: "What?"
Fast Talking Counter Girl: "Beefchickenorsteak?"
Me: "It's an enchrito. There's only one option."
Fast Talking Counter Girl: "Nothoseoptionsareavailableeventhoughthey'renotonthemenu".
I hate you.
In case you've been living under a rock, it's Election Day. I usually vote over lunch as I've found my polling place is pretty empty if I leave a little early. Five-ten minutes process tops. But we have a new polling place this year and I was up early, so I headed straight down ahead of their 7:00 am opening.
Enter the big spacious lobby of the YMCA. Greeted by some very friendly guy who points me to the obvious line. Not bad...I count 13 possible voters ahead of me. Two minutes to opening. The line has a view of the YMCA's pool. Old men, some in Speedos, are standing around the pool in what looks like some bizarre Twin Peaks scene.
(Someday, I'm going to be that guy. The old man in the Speedo. Yes.)
7:00 am sharp, the line starts moving. This is where things get stupid.
The voting room is small. REALLY small. Less than half the size of the old place, maybe even a quarter. There's three points you have to check in at versus one in the previous election that I remember. You have to fill out a form at the first point, give it to the second point who verifies who you are and puts a sticker on the first form, then the third point where you pick up your ballot.
There's nine voting booths. Three of these are unusable because the line to get through the check points are right up against them. Doesn't matter because the second check-in point takes so long that there's never more than two or three people voting anyway.
I fill out my form at the first point then get back in line for the second point, which is crammed between the first check in point and the unusable voting booths. It winds around the small space where the other voting booths are and the machine you submit your ballot in is. The woman handing out ballots, having nothing better to do while the people verifying voters are taking forever, comes up to the line and says "You can't be this close to the voting booths".
We argue that there's no more space to stand in. She sort of agrees, then decides to push the voting booths closer together. I am not even exaggerating when I say the Fire Marshall would shut this room down if he saw this. It's absolutely ridiculous.
When I get to the second check-in point, I notice the holdup is because the two girls checking for registration are taking forever...like three to five minutes per person...to do their job. There's an option to scan your drivers license at the check point to expedite the process. I do this. This does quicken the process, but the girl still stares at the screen forever before asking me what my date of birth is for verification. But I'm still out far faster than the voter next to me.
I get my ballot. I go to a "booth" (a small plastic surround divider) and get to voting. There is absolutely no way in this space that my voting is private...at least a couple in line can't help but have full view access to my ballot.
Voting is quick if you're a straight-line ticket voter (which I'm not). You can vote party, then flip the ballot over for everything else, which is nothing but a few judges. We're not one of those states/counties that has a crapload of silly propositions.
Push through the cramped space to the machine you stick the ballot in, argue with the woman manning it, submit the ballot. Squeeze your way through the single door this room has, which is full of people trying to come in. Done.
28 minutes from door to exit, with only 13 people voting before me that I counted. At that rate, they'll be lucky to get 400 voters voted in this precinct by closing time (9:00 pm) tonight. The old place could handle roughly a dozen voters at the same time easily.
Who approved this space? It's not like this is the world's first election, let alone this county's.
Ridiculous.
At least the TV campaign commercials will go away now, to be replaced by the usual bombardment of ads for prescription drugs.
Which I find every bit as offensive as the campaign ads.
