Place: McDonald's
Lunch: Big Mac, fries, Southern chicken sandwich, orange drink, orange drink
I have a Big Mac craving and I want to try the new chicken sandwich. So I order the Big Mac combo and a chicken sandwich. Smiling Counter Guy notes that, if I buy a medium drink, I get the chicken sandwich for free. It's a day-only promotion of some sort. So I go that route. And end up with two drink cups...one for the sandwich deal, and one for the combo.
The Southern chicken sandwich is McDonald's answer to the Chick-Fil-A. It's WAY smaller though, and probably not worth $2.99.
Last night, I went to the Shangri-La Buffet for dinner. I have dinner here once or twice a month. It has unusually good food for a cheap Chinese buffet. You can't beat their crab rangoons.
So I walk in the door, and a cute young smiling waitress says to me "You come for your bill?"
"What?" I reply bewildered.
"You here last night?"
"No."
"You never been here before," she says sarcastically.
"No, I've been here before. I just wasn't here last night."
Apparently, she thinks I was here last night and didn't pay for my dinner.
I wasn't here last night. I was at home eating Ivar's chowder. And tacos that I picked up on the way. Tacos and chowder. It's what's for dinner.
People who walk out without paying are selfish, stupid deviants. As worthless as used toilet paper, and about on the same social level. But people who blame me for doing so are just as bad.
She seats me and things are business as usual until at some point when I'm eating and she brings the check, points at the money tray, and says "You pay now."
She SERIOUSLY believes I was here the previous night and welched on the check!
It's not like I have one of those faces. The only person on Earth as hideous looking as me is my father, and as far as I know, he's in Alaska right now. This girl wears glasses. They're in need of checking, I think.
And who would do such a thing and COME BACK THE NEXT NIGHT? Common sense is not at play here.
In any case, she gets her money, brings me change, and says "Thank you."
I stare. I'm doing a slow boil at this point.
She again says "Thank you."
At this point, I am ready to tear her apart.
But I don't.
I'll never go back.
